Tried turkey bowling

in this hall, but the bird would not stay frozen in the heat!

WOOPS

If room-service was not there in 10 minutes the waiter turned to stone. This dude made it in 11!

NO it does not say that!

This is not the Jimmy B, Allen J. song thing it is what happens when you get a shirt made after a quart of tequila!



It's 5 o'clock
Me WHERE?

Whiskey River

From here a swimmer, floater or bobber could move down stream to the swim up bar, re-load and continue down to the hot tub.

A long walk

off a short.............

long "river" pool

Of the six pools this one was the longest and snaked around a good seafood joint and ended at a float or swim-up bar.

It also was not heated so those who road the stream had to warm up at the bar.

Even though WILMA got the palms

They set up tons of these huts to shade your bod under.

Room faced EAST

And the sun really did get your attention when it came out of the ocean in the morning!

Water color

The gulf really had a ton of color shades. There was a reef five miles out and the depth was shallow out about a quarter of a mile. With the bright sun and the wind the color of the water changed depending on the time of the day, it was shades of blue, but never real dark like the Atlantic or clear like the Caribbean.

EARLY morning waves

Early, like just before the sun came up, the waves really did look cool!

Beach and shade

Tractors cleaned the beach at first light and there was never a fight for a chair or a towel.

Beach next door

Beach ran for miles and connected with the scattered resorts, but next door they didn't clean it every morning.

Sand WAS this white

Miles of really good sand that never was hot even when the days got into the mid 80s.
ALL of the palm trees were either topped out or new because of the storm last year.

Tile all over the place

Even with miles of tile and concrete the resort had been closed for two weeks due to WILMA visiting last year. The rebuild coupled with the bright Mexican sun tossed great shadows on all of the outside halls.

No seasons in Mexic

No seasons in Mexcio give you flowers year round!

REDNECK TAN, pool was heated, air was 86 and the Sprink Break Animals were 40 miles away!

dang it all to heck

Da VOLS are now done, tried but just could NOT beat some dork Kansas team! Let us all hold hands and look to the fall as Phil and the kids try it one more time. As for next winter, these boys will have a few of da Pearls new kids in their tent and life should be great fun!

Lots of winter nights running out of the parking lot in the cold to see da Pearl this year, but next will be even better!

Mr. Blogster is drinking again and won't post pictures, lord I don't even know if this dang text mess will make it but I am going to give it a shot.

thoughts for St. Pats day and more!

Hangovers If you don't laugh, then you just can't relate. Guess you had to have been there one time or another..........

One Star Hangover (*): No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively! well; however, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak & fries.

Two Star Hangover (**): No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the fruity pancake from the 3:00 AM Waffle House excursion. ! There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***): Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet Coke --- yet you haven't peed once.

Four Star Hangover (****): Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the &! nbsp;bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five craps you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover (*****): You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. In fact, you are probably still drunk. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare 'floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'floater' seems to be t! o splash the toilet ;water all over your butt. Death sounds pretty good about right now!

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: Indubitably Innovative Preliminary Proliferation Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: Specificity British Constitution Passive-aggressive disorder Loquacious Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK: Thanks, but I don't want to have sex. Nope, no more booze for me. Sorry, but you're not really my type. Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight. Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

FIRST, I told Denver if we won in the first round I would take him to the river and on the way let him admire our great forsithia bush that is going nuts on the corner of the estate!

THEN I told him he could drink out of LITTLE RIVER!

The walk down relaxed us after the 8.4 second last ditch shot that sent da VOLS into the next round. Neighbors trees are really getting excited about SPRING!

Last thing we noticed was some guys fishing just up from our lot, we yelled to tell them da VOLS won and they yelled back their appreciation. Denver relaxed and ambled back to the estate.

Ideas

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be instantly removed.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember:Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.

Be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.