NEW MOUNTAIN PICTURES

A FAMILY WEEKEND IN THE NATIONAL PARK FOUND TONS OF GREAT THINGS TO TAKE PICTURES OF!

MARCH 22nd PARTY!!!!!!!

MARCH 22
A PRE-GAME PARTY
YOU ARE INVITED
THE ATOMIC OUTHOUSE WILL PLAY
DOWNTOWN MARYVILLE
SULLIVANS
FROM 7 P.M. UNTIL THE LAW IS CALLED



















































April Foolies...(American Idol On Acid)will be March 31 @ Wilson Auditorium, Maryville College. Tickets on sale at the United Way office (98 2 2251) and the beautiful Capitol Theater (look for the biggest marque in downtown Maryville) at this very moment. Food starts at 5:30 then the Show Of Shows kicks off at 7.

More APRIL FOOLIES TV SHOOT PHOTOS

April Foolies...(American Idol On Acid)will be March 31 @ Wilson Auditorium, Maryville College. Tickets on sale at the United Way office (98 2 2251) and the beautiful Capitol Theater (look for the biggest marque in downtown Maryville) at this very moment. Food starts at 5:30 then the Show Of Shows kicks off at 7.

Here are more pictures of the TV shoot (finished product to air on Charter in days)and if you will scroll down a post you can see even more of the behind the scene action. If you think the people in these pictures humiliated themselves you really need to be at the show and see humiliation on the NEXT LEVEL!

APRIL FOOLIES SHOOT

Pictures from the TV shoot for the April Foolies. The spots should start on Charter next week and the show is March 31st, Maryville College in the Wilson Auditorium. Buy a ticket and sport three great agencies.. Child Net, New Hope and United Way Success By 6. Tickets now on sale at the Capitol Theater in downtown Maryville.

As always, click on the picture to make it bigger...some of these you might wanta think twice before you do!

APRIL FOOLIES IN MARCH

WELCOME IF YOU ARE NEW, if not welcome anyway! We are into a beautiful March with only a few major fires to worry us.



Please remember to mark your calendar for the April Foolies (Naturally they are in March) at the Wilson Auditorium on the Maryville College campus.

Food starts at 5:30
Show starts at 7:00

Three wonderful agencies benefit from your attendance and the efforts of Blount County's finest talent! Ok, some acts stink but kind of like the American Idol auditions they are great fun to watch!

Tickets on sale at the United Way East Broadway Maryville.

FLORIDA UT GAME FUN

Florida is so mad today after we nailed them to the wall last night. Pat did her thing and here are some pictures taken from WAY UP HIGH of her. CLICK on them to make them bigger and GO VOLS!

global WHAT

Between , ALGORE'S GLOBAL WARMING and the open warfare between Hilla and BimBamBomber reading the paper is now kinda fun!


ALGORE made a movie that Hollyweird loves and will honor Sunday night in the record breaking Acadamy Awards show. Talk about a mega BACKFIRE, rather than getting the man who forgot to take the hanger out of his jacket a back door pass to become the leader of the free world all the flick did was to scare little children across the pond! Flash, this just in, ALGORE has cut a deal with the Academy that if he wins he will not wear his Aluminum Hat on stage provided Tipper can have a drum solo as the band plays him off.

As for Hilla and BimBamBomber man what fun those two children are having! Here is the dark side...(OK bad choice of words sorry) Although it is great fun to see these two start to snarl and scratch if they do manage to keep each other out of the race then WHO will represent their tribe in 08? Lord help us all Tiny Tim if they hit the ditch then you know who (see Aluminum Hat and scared children above) could actually have a shot! Play NICE BIMBAMB and HILLA, the nation depends on it.

THEM demoRATS are fighting

Watching the left pick and chew on each other is better than Live Rassselllen on WTVK even with Big Jim doing the play by play! CHECK OUT WHAT The Post is saying about it!

AIR AMERICA again?

AIR AMERICA LIMPING BACK


The left wing radio voice got a small shot of adrenalin yesterday when a couple of brothers picked up the long over due tab on the networks debts.

Stephen Green and brother Mark, described as real estate investment moguls called the move a personal investment adding that the sale should be done in mid-February. Both guys are said to be joined at the hip to the democrat party. Brother Mark was beaten in 2001 when he ran against New York mayor Michael R. Bloomberg. Stephen says he is going to fix the horrid ratings, management mess and general lack of cash. He also has plans to think “out of the box” find some talent for the network and figure out a way to lure more listeners.

Here is the upside for the joint; word is Al Franken will not be around to see the new attempt at finding an audience. This time out the liberal agenda will be spread by new talent as they try to expand the Air America “brand” into other marketing and broadcast areas.

Good luck!

The wake behind the first run with the network is still filled with the dead. Advertisers and today even democrats have found associations with Air America can be about as beneficial as a malignant melanoma. The hate speech driven agenda is the brand and the fact that the format only generated two million listeners nation wide is a great incentive to both fire the staff and burn the brand simultaneously. Air America was a plan that never worked. Couple that with failure on the level of a Kerry or Gore and you can see why any linkage to the old brand would be a disaster.

Can the new Air America work? Sure, start by having closed door meetings with those who are successful in the world of talk radio. Take some of the “investment” money and structure a new talk radio model around their style, then hire unknowns to bring a fresh approach to an aging product. Air America was selling a product that had no customer base. If the Greens want to make their adventure fly look at who is listening to talk radio and mold your network into something they want to hear. Sure the hate speech and the left agenda will have to be tossed but if you are looking for success you have no other choice.

POLITICAL THOUGHTS

It is great fun to see posts from the left coast pop up on the blog. Unlike knoxviews.com they are welcome and never edited.

Question, what causes the RAGE in the party of Jessie Jackson and Teddy Kennedy? Is it just me or do these people seem mad at the world? If any of them can explain it man share it with us OK?

On this side of the river we are growing faster than you can say, LETS MOVE OUT OF KNOX COUNTY! The Daily times had a nice overview of our newest area of expansion, dash over and check it out! http://www.thedailytimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070123/NEWS/701230305

Also downtown is coming back beautifully. Unlike the OLD CITY we don't have the crime or the tax problems and as far as I can tell we have yet to have a dope dealer buy up very many buildings?

Come visit and spend money!

Now here is something to ponder and if you are a member of the above mentioned demoRAT party feel free to post your thoughts! Bless your heart.




>>WHY I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER !!!
>> The Democrats new promise "A New Direction For America"
>>
>>
>>
>> The stock market is at a new all-time high and America's 401K's are
>> back.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Unemployment is at 25 year lows.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Oil prices are plummeting.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Taxes are at 20 year lows.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Federal tax revenues are at all-time highs.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> The Federal deficit is down almost 50%, just as predicted over last
>> year.
>>
>> A new direction from there means. what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Home valuations are up 200% over the past 3.5 years.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Inflation is in check, hovering at 20 year lows.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Not a single terrorist attack on US soil since 9/11/01.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Osama bin Laden is living under a rock in a dark cave, having not
>> surfaced
>>
>> in years, if he's alive at all, while 95% of Al Queda's top dogs are
>> either
>>
>> dead or in custody, cooperating with US Intel.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Several major terrorist attacks already thwarted by US and British
>> Intel,
>>
>> including the recent planned attack involving 10 Jumbo Jets being
>> exploded
>>
>> in mid-air over major US cities in order to celebrate the anniversary
>> of the
>>
>> 9/11/01 attacks.
>>
>> A new direction from there means, what?
>>
>>
>>
>> Now let me see, do I have this right? I can expect:
>>
>> The economy to go South
>>
>>
>>
>> Illegals to go North
>>
>>
>>
>> Taxes to go Up
>>
>>
>>
>> Employment to go Down
>>
>>
>>
>> Terrorism to come In
>>
>> Tax breaks to go Out
>>
>>
>>
>> Social Security to go Away
>>
>>
>>
>> Health Care to go the same way gas prices have gone


>> I can gain comfort by knowing that Nancy P, Hillary C, John K, Edward
>> K,
>>
>> Howard D, Harry R, and Obama have worked hard to create a comprehensive
>>
>> National Security Plan, Health Care Plan, Immigration Reform Plan, Gay
>>
>> Rights Plan, Same Sex Marriage Plan, Abortion On Demand Plan, Tolerance
>> of Everyone and
>>
>> Everything Plan, How to Return all Troops to the U.S. in The Next Six
>> Months
>>
>> Plan, A Get Tough Plan, adapted from the French Plan by the same name,
>> and a How
>>
>> Everyone Can Become as Wealthy as We Are Plan. I forgot the No More
>> Katrina Storm Plan.
>>
>>
>>
>> Now I know why I feel so good after the elections. I am going to be
>> able to
>>
>> sleep so much better at nights knowing these dedicated politicians are
>> thinking of
>>
>> me, my life's savings and my welfare.





STATE OF UNION SPEECH PULLS 6.7 RATING/10 SHARE FOR FOX-TV, TOPS NBC'S 6.6 RATING/10 SHARE, 5.7/8 CBS; ABC LAST PLACE AT 5.0/7... MORE... TOTAL BIG 4 'STATE' 24.0 RATING/35 SHARE OVER 'IDOL' 19.0 RATING/28 SHARE ON FOX...

OLD BUT STILL FUNNY

These have been around the block a few times but they are still both funny and TRUE!


Mattel recently announced the release of the improved limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Knoxville market:

"Farragut Barbie"
This princess Barbie is sold only at Turkey Creek. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.

"Cedar Bluff Barbie"
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind star Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

"Magnolia Barbie"
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) ..unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

"Sequoya Hills Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

"Maynardville Barbie"
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

"Halls Barbie"
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Farragut Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

"Old City Barbie"
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Old City Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

"Knoxville Barbie"
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

"Carousel Barbie/Ken"
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts

NEW MEDIA REPORT UP

I MISS the fall!


At last a new media report...just do the profile thing and click over!

Lots of dieting going on at the bunker, so naturally I found a great sounding CAKE to make! Knock it out and share a slice with me.


CHOCOLATE MAYO CAKE

3 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1 1/2 cups mayonnaise
1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 1/2 cups water
2 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 350 degrees (175 degrees C). Lightly grease
two 9 inch layer pans.

Mix flour, baking soda, baking powder, cocoa, and sugar
into a large bowl. Stir in mayonnaise. Gradually add water
and vanilla and blend until smooth. Pour batter into pre-
pared pans.

Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 30 minutes. Cool,
remove from pans, and frost with your favorite chocolate
frosting.

Just got this and because we are blessed to live SOUTH of Ohio we don't have to deal with snow. From this note it sounds like the folks in DENVER did a great job!


Weather Bulletin - Denver

Up here, in the "Mile-Hi City", we just recovered from a
Historic event--- may I even say a "Weather Event" of
"Biblical Proportions" --- with a historic blizzard of up
to 44" inches of snow and winds to 90 MPH that broke trees
in half, knocked down utility poles, stranded hundreds of
motorists in lethal snow banks, closed ALL roads, isolated
scores of communities and cut power to 10's of thousands.

FYI:

George Bush did not come.

FEMA did nothing.

No one howled for the government.

No one blamed the government.

No one even uttered an expletive on TV.

Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton did not visit.

Our Mayor did not blame Bush or anyone else.

Our Governor did not blame Bush or anyone else, either.

CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX or NBC did not visit - or report on this
category 5 snowstorm. Nobody demanded $2,000 debit
cards.

No one asked for a FEMA Trailer House.

No one looted.

Nobody - I mean Nobody demanded the government do something.

Nobody expected the government to do anything, either.

No Larry King, No Bill O'Rielly, No Oprah, No Chris Mathews
and No Geraldo Rivera.

No Shaun Penn, No Barbara Striesand, No Hollywood types to
be found.

Nope, we just melted the snow for water.

Sent out caravans of SUV's to pluck people out of snow
engulfed cars.

The truck drivers pulled people out of snow banks and didn't
ask for a penny.

Local restaurants made food and the police and fire
departments delivered it to the snowbound families.

Families took in the stranded people - total strangers.

We fired up wood stoves, broke out coal oil lanterns or
Coleman lanterns.

We put on extra layers of clothes because up here it is
"Work or Die".

We did not wait for some affirmative action government to
get us out of a mess created by being immobilized by a
welfare program that trades votes for 'sittin at home'
checks.

Even though a Category "5" blizzard of this scale has never
fallen this early, we know it can happen and how to deal
with it ourselves.

"In my many travels, I have noticed that once one gets
north of about 48 degrees North Latitude, 90% of the
world's social problems evaporate."

It does seem that way, at least to me.

I hope this gets passed on.

Maybe SOME people will get the message. The world
does Not
owe you a living.

2006 WAS GREAT FUN

A NEW YEAR!


If you get a second dash over to Media Report (hit my profile and click on it) some pictures of a small Knoxville radio reunion show on AM 1180 this week will be up Sunday (12 31 06) night. Included in the gossip and remembrances of old radio "daze" there is an inside report on the now famous Eddy Beacon Bank Robbery, don't miss it!

Looking back at 2006 my favorite story was Barbaro. I saw him pull up in the Derby, and then later followed the coverage of him being moved to the hospital. Over the next few weeks everyone from the docs to the fans had him in the ground, but Barbaro fooled everyone. It is both odd and sad that while the liberals are sobbing over the neck tie party given to SoDamnInsane (check it out, it will make you throw up
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x3034002) this great Champion's victory over death is going unreported by the drive by media.

Across the river the stories that made me laugh the most were all political; bless their hearts Knoxville just has SO much fun around election time. Remember the tempest in the tea pot blended up by Da Bean with her interview of the former rogue politico now reportedly hiding in a cave north of Bristol? A giant three part story that was founded on a source with the credibility of Clinton (I did NOT have sex with…) and fueled by the fire of liberal scribe who never read the rule about having two or more sources before you touch off your cannons. The positive side of the story was its literary value, granted at this point most if not all of it is under the heading of fiction. We all LOVED the threads of cloudy assumptions that the star of the canard has yet to return to Knoxville to back up. Sprinkle in the other stories about the shooting at a candidate (still under intense but quiet investigation) and the near gun play of an elected official and you have a political year rivaled only by the long dead Cas Walker.

In Blount County we have grown our downtown, seen Alcoa develop a baby "Turkey Creek", and celebrated two high school state football champions. There are tons of other great things just about to surface in Knoxville's largest suburb but to mention them would just give more folks the idea that Pell Parkway is the road to heaven and move on over. We love you guys visiting, but often you bring YANKEES when your tribe moves in mass into our county! Bless their hearts not only are more than a few of them democrats, all of them just don't get it. Come visit and spend money, but keep voting in KNOXVILLE! Thanks and have a heck of a 2007.

SANTA WEEK!!!!!!!

Santa WEEK!

Is it as good as it was when you were a kid or is it BETTER?
Ponder that in your heart and then drop a note with your thoughts either in the comments, or e mail them to me at wjonair1@aol.com.


I sure know it is different. A quick glance at the way we sing about the season lets you know this ain't your carols sung by a choir holiday anymore. Back in 1993 my favorite new Christmas singer, Bob Rivers released (or some say let escape) a seasonal record on Atlantic called I AM SANTA CLAUSE. Tunes on this now family favorite include:

WALKIN 'ROUND IN WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR (tune of Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree)
I CAME UPON A ROADKILL DEAR
TEDDY THE RED-NOSED SENATOR
THE UNDER TREE WORLD OF JACQUES COUSTEAU
And a host of other fine renderings.

In 1997 Rivers let another CD out of the pit called Bob Rivers presents MORE TWISTED CHRISTMAS. Featuring such heart warming tunes as:
It's THE MOST FATTENING TIME OF THE YEAR
SLED ZEPPELIN
YELLOW SNOW
THERE'S A SANTA WHO LOOKS A LOT LIKE ELVIS
BUTTCRACKER SUITE
HEY YOU GET OFF MY HOUSE
RUMMY ROCKER BOY
and a few more selections to mellow your Yule Log.

Both CDs are on Atlantic and I am sure if you are a down loader of music you can find them this time of year.

The upside to Christmas is it only comes once a year and the down side is it still only comes once a year. An old tune once talked about keeping Christmas all year long, good or bad? Again, discuss and let me know.

Things I always miss about this time of the year when February rolls around are Claxton Fruit Cakes (found at a gas station near you), TV Christmas shows including the day time drama's week long parties, and the twenty four hour cable channels that go all holiday movies. Check out the Media Report (as always go to my profile and click) for more on what is on when. Last but not least I really miss those five inches of advertising inserts in the local rag that are all done on slick paper designed to make them fall into the street or yard the second you try to find the Local section when you open the thing up.

Key to this time of the year is it is what you make it so enjoy the eggnog, eat way too much, dance alone at the office party, and start getting excited about 2007.

Merry Christmas!!

Good and Odd thoughts!

Don't forget to dash over to the media report (just click my profile and then hit the link) it updates every Sunday evening. This week there is a picture featuring the founder of the Fulton High School radio/media department and some students. As always if you can NAME anyone in the shot you win nothing!

I just got something from a regular reader of the column that fits beautifully into the season.
Check this out.

YOU CAN'T STEAL
MY CHRISTMAS

Poem by Sharon Steege


I don't know who they are
Saying I can't greet the crowd
The way that I want to
Can't say CHRISTMAS out loud.


I walk into a business place
See things that I rather not see
But dare I not say CHRISTMAS
And ask for a "holiday" tree.


What happened to freedom of speech
And living in the land of the free
How can they take my CHRISTMAS money
But can't say MERRY CHRISTMAS to me.


Men and women have given their lives
So we could still go free
I wonder how they would feel
At saying "HOLIDAY" TREE.



Earlier this week an e mail showed up featuring a news story on WVLT. Folks I kid you not, THIS made the air!


Kingston Police Looking For Coin Thief
Updated: 12:26 PM Dec 11, 2006


"Kingston, Roane County (WVLT) - Police need your help finding a man they say has found a unique way to steal.
This surveillance video shows the suspect putting a five dollar bill into the automatic change dispenser at "BJ&E" car wash.

The man puts the bill in just far enough to trigger the coin drop, but not far enough to keep the machine from taking the bill.
Police believe he's done it twice to the same machine in the last two months.
They're looking for a white man, with dark hair, a stocky build and he's in his twenties to early thirties.
If you know who this might be, call the Kingston Police Department at 376-2081."


LORD HELP LOCK UP THE CHILDREN AND DOGS AND LOAD THE .12 GAGE! No really, if say this string bandit manages to make the change dispenser let go a full five dollars in quarters and he HIT IT twice in two months..UNLESS he is causing all the coins in the machine to drop... his take is just $10.00 or $2.00 a week? Bless his heart, if he would just tilt the LazyBoy in the den of his single wide I bet he could find that much at HOME!




And you are shocked at WHAT???

THE WASHINGTON TIMES
December 12, 2006


"Democratic campaign operatives pushed newspapers to write about then-Rep. Mark Foley's e-mails to teenage pages in the hope that a scandal would emerge before the midterm elections, according to a House ethics report."







AND NOW for the good stuff!!!!



Top ten signs you're on a bad date:

* 10.He eats his steak with his fingers and uses his fork to scratch his armpits.
* 9. During the movie, you notice she's holding hands with the guy on the other side.
* 8. She says "I'll probably finish my dinner before you since I have worms."
* 7. After the goodnight kiss, she tells you her real name is Bruce.
* 6. She doesn't even say "Thank You" after dinner at the A & P.
* 5. You go to Disneyland and she kicks "Goofy" in the shins.
* 4. You keep losing your date because she keeps moving to a different Internet chat room.
* 3. Instead of the bill, the waiter gives you a note that says "You run, I'll stall her!"
* 2. He hurries to drop you off by 10 because Hillary gets home at 11.
* 1. He says "Whoa! 8:15 already?"




This one is funny but dang if it ain't got a slight ring of truth to it?

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fight after school.
>> 1973 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end
>> up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled.
>>
>> 2006 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark.
>> Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
>>
>> 1973 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by
>> Principal. Sits still in class.
>>
>> 2006 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School
>> gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
>>
>> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad
>> gives him a whipping.
>>
>> 1973 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to
>> college, and becomes a successful businessman.
>>
>> 2006 - Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to
>> foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state
>> psychologist
>> that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad goes to prison.
>> Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to
>> school.
>>
>> 1973 - Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the
>> smoking dock.
>>
>> 2006 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations.
>> Car searched for drugs and weapons.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Mary turns up pregnant.
>>
>> 1973 - 5 High School Boys leave town. Mary does her senior year at a
>> special school for expectant mothers.
>>
>> 2006 - Middle School Counselor calls Planned Parenthood, who
>> notifies the ACLU. Mary is driven to the next state over and gets an
>> abortion
>> without her parent's consent or knowledge. Mary given condoms and
>> told to be more careful next time.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
>>
>> 1973: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
>>
>> 2006: Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper
>> articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a
>> requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action
>> lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher.
>> English
>> banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up
>> mowing
>> lawns for a living because he can't speak English.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of
>> July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant
>> bed.
>>
>> 1973 - Ants die.
>>
>> 2006 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with
>> domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from
>> home,
>> computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and
>> is never allowed to fly again.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his
>> knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary, hugs him to
>> comfort
>> him.
>>
>> 1973 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
>>
>> 2006 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job.
>> She faces 3 years in State Prison.
>>
>> +++++++++++++++++++++
>>
>> Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.
>> 1973 - Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes
>> to his car and gets his to show Jack.
>>
>> 2006 - School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to
>> jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for
traumatized students and teachers.

Dream Speech

We are back! Lots of good news over on the media report just hit my profile and click on it to check it out. The pictures were taken the night before the big cold front/wind rolled into our area. They are all from the banks of Little River. It was sunset and the fog was really odd due to the changing pressure.


Last week this great "dream" speech came over the cyber transom. Read it and then send it to all your buds. Do NOT fail to send it to your liberal acquaintances and if any of you can still post on knoxviews.com toss it into that batch of lefties! If you are not a visitor of knoxviews.com better hurry, more than a few folks have told me it is on the skids due to a myriad of problems. I certainly am not saying they are headed under the waves, just what those who hang out in the old city are whispering while they shop for beads and feathers. As I have said in the past I hope the site never fades away, although they are scared of posters outside of their club and they rage against anything GW and the guys do, they are great fun to read!

Here is the dream speech!



WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT
OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?








My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been
completed.

Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our
mission in Iraq is complete.

This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces
from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now to begin
the reckoning.

Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which
have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The
United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the
countries listed there.

The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's
nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of
both lists later this evening.

Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved
during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi
war.

The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world
countries and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money
toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that
note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you
down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.

Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China.

I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring
from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.

I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN
diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking
tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and
crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps
have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or
watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the
finest chop shops in the world. I love New York

A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely
to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not
ticking us off for a change.

Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government
really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and
infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep,
border security. So start doing something with your oil.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting
now.


We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil
in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to
come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you
to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. They care.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin."
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world
has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate
homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from
America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you
and we won't forget. To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might
want to learn to speak Arabic. God bless America. Thank you and good night.
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English,
thank a soldier.